We should all be so impressed and feel honored that President Trump is an expert on everything.
While the Notre Dame Cathedral was burning, Trump told the firefighters in Paris the way to put the fire out. Fly over it and drop thousands of gallons of water on the fire and, voila, catastrophe averted.
And he solved the problem from a few thousand miles away.
A fire official on the scene said if they did that, it would likely cause a collapse of the walls, destroying what was left inside that could be salvaged.
It was reminiscent of the time a few months ago that he told the firefighters in California to rake all the leaves under the trees in the forest and the fire danger would disappear. That's the way they do it in Finland, he said. Trump said Finland's president, Sauli Niinisto, told him they rake all the leaves and thus no forest fires.
Niinisto later said he told Trump no such thing.
But Trump, our president, knows all. In fact I fully expect him to dig deep into his knowledge of medicine and announce he knows the cure for all cancers and will announce that cure immediately after he is re-elected to his second term next year.
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While I was writing this column, a thousand reporters were on the cable airwaves trying to explain the 400-page Mueller report they just received.
As might be expected, they are not doing a perfect job or even a somewhat perfect job. All-in-all, it's as if 1,000 blind people were just introduced to an elephant and were forced to give an instant report on what they believe it is.
Here's this sightless man's report:
Robert Mueller did as thorough a job as he could under the strange circumstances and rules.
First and foremost, he knew that any attempt to dredge up information that could lead to an indictment of the president would all be in vain since it is assumed that no president can be indicted while he is serving as president.
It appears, however, Mueller presented enough information for the House of Representatives to take the ball and begin an impeachment proceeding.
The House, meanwhile, realizes that if it began an impeachment, it could take well beyond next year's general election to conclude. And even if he were impeached, the current Republican Senate would vote not to throw him out of office.
And what about those serving the president in the White House? It appears Mueller believes that if they did wrong, they did it because Trump asked them to do it, though Mueller can't prove it.
It's a tangled mess that may never be solved or understood,
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Just when we were given a little light at the end of the opioid tunnel, we learn that the feds have indicted about 60 Appalachian medical professionals for being opioid drug pushers.
We thought the medical profession had cleaned house years ago. Not so. Greed is everywhere, including those who claim to treat us for diseases and ailments.
Now we must wonder if those who arrested 60 mostly doctors and nurses found them all.
Dave Peyton is on Facebook. His email address is firstname.lastname@example.org.